Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Best Friends

It's been a while that my student has been posting several angry post targeted to her friends in school, saying that they don't share secrets with her anymore, that they have changed and she doesn't feel like she is their best friend anymore. Reading all her angry post, brings me nostalgic memories of me in my younger days, where I was once in that exact same position, back when "best friends" was of utmost importance. I really felt like reaching out to her, to tell her that friends aren't determined by the number of secrets that you share with each other and that friends like that are maybe not worth having too. Unhealthy friends that gossips and that pulls other people down. That being popular and having a lot of friends is not the only way to go, that having a small group of friends who are there for you through thick and thin is better than having a hundred friends but none who would stick by you. I want to tell her all these things, yet I have to understand that at her tender age, this is of importance to her. It's not important to me, but it is to her, that to feel accepted and to feel belonged = to have lots of friends. I used to remember a time where I use to rank all my friends. Best friend, Great friend, Good friend and Friend; but as I grow older, I don't see the need to rank friends. So I don't have a Best Friend nor do I have a Great Friend, everyone is a friend, each awesome in their own unique way, no one out beating another friend. In fact "best friend" has a totally opposite meaning to me now. Best friend is now used for people who are pretty anal to you, for example your really anal boss who is always in your face, so when she come down the hall you say: "eh, your best friend is coming" So yea. Please don't misunderstand me my dear friends who reads my blog, it's not that you're not good enough to be my best friend or whatsoever, it's more like I don't see the need to give a title to it because every single one of you is important to me, unique and awesome in your own special way. And through the years, I found out who my true friends were. Like a statement a wise friend told me "having a handful of true friends is better than having a hundred friends who wouldn't bat an eyelash for you if something were to happen to you" Though I may not live a life of a socialite (I don't have many friends, so if I say I'm going out with high school friends...well it's always the same people...very predictable who I'm out with.) but I thank God for placing such fantastic friends around me. Borrowing me laptop when mine kena stolen, accompanying me to the police station in the wee hours of the morning, offering me a ride when my car broke down even though it was out of her way, offering me transport to the airport, offering up their house for me to stay when they know i'm home alone, offer me full accommodation + transport in Australia HAHAHAHAHAHA ...where la to find friends like these? Sometimes I even wonder, what have I done to ever deserve such friends...I'm grateful for each and everyone of you =) And to think of last time, I yearned to be accepted and be popular, to have many friends only to find out that well...it isn't so important after all. Bottom line, it's quality and not quantity that matters. I've definitely came a long way and I hope for my little student that she would let go, move on and 10 years down the road she would be laughing at history. I finally reached out to her and I hope my words encourages her =)      

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