What would it be like to be blind?

I think most of us are guilty for saying "oh, I don't really see the face, it's the heart that matters." , but how many times do we really see a person for their heart and not their faces? Like it or not, we do see people at face value; and if you have a pleasant looking face somehow half the battle is done for you. For example, if a pretty looking girl were to suddenly come up to you and ask you for your phone number, you are more likely to give her your number; but if someone who has a disfigured face were to approach you and ask you for your number, I think most of us would hesitate to give out our numbers.

So, back to the question, how many times do we really see a person for their hearts and not their faces? Because the face is what we see before we are willing to give the heart a chance. And then I thought, being blind has it's benefits too, because I think the blind see much more clearer than we who have sight. They "see" the true heart of a person. To the blind, the social world is equal (for the people who approach them). They don't give chances just because you are pretty/ handsome, and they get to know you for you. I don't see it as the blind has to accept whoever that comes their way just because they are handicap and if they don't accept them then nobody wants them, but how I look at it is that they genuinely get to know you for who you really are inside without prejudice or judgement based on physical appearance.

I appreciate my ability to see and am grateful for it (though my eyesight isn't perfect), but sometimes I wonder, what would it be like to be blind for a day?  To be able to feel the love of the people who help you on your journey, the love of your family, things which we take for granted; and to get to know people for who they really are, and I suppose people could really be themselves around blind people coz the blind is not gonna frown at your fully tattooed body, or frown at you for being dressed like a prostitute. To the blind, we are all humans who have needs and deserve to be loved and be heard. I believe it would be a wonderful experience to see people through the eyes of a blind person.

Haih...very naive of me I must admit, to think that being blind is all that wonderful, I'm pretty sure they would trade all the money in the world to regain their sight...all the hardships they go through....I just wish that people or for that matter, myself, could be blind to physical appearance or to skin colour, but somehow i think it's kindda impossible to do unless you're completely blind -.- WORLD Y U SO COMPLICATED!!!   

Off the bucket list!

Running a marathon is off the bucket list! Though it's only 10km (maybe i'll join a full marathon one day) but it's still an achievement to me. I've never ran 10km before, but after this experience, 10k isn't so hard after all. I'm usually the person who chooses to sleep in instead of going for morning walks with my mother..so being able to achieve this is a fantastic feeling. My main goal of this race was to win a finisher's medal...I was in only for the medal. Nothing else. I'm glad I managed to finish the race within the stipulated time or else all my training would be sort of wasted. So my next goal would be to finish better than my current timing if I were to join another marathon.

It's amazing what the body can do, and sometimes it all just boils down to mental fitness. If you think you can finish, you can..it's whether the brain is willing or not. I think the environment helps too, seeing other runners run, it's like peer pressure making you wanna run too..I've never ran so much in my life...even when I was training, the most was just running 1.5km continuously....today was epic.. No wonder people say if you train, train with other people. I think it helps give you motivation. So yea another item off my bucket list all thanks to Houyi who invited me to join in this for FREE!! coz her company was the sponsor for the event.

  

On another note, I can't help thinking that my puppy came out from a comic book. How to be angry at this rascal la? He drives me up the wall, yet when you scold him, he gives you the most sorrowful eyes...

I learnt something today.. Something that was repeated so many times, came across numerous times, read about countless of times, but nothing beats experiencing it for my own.

We will never really know what a person has gone through and sometimes little actions that seemed so insignificant to you speaks volumes to the other person who receives it, and I'm glad she acknowledged it and told me. I never knew just acknowledging what she said spoke volumes to her and impacted her, which leads to opening up of other things in our lives. I don't find it easy to share my personal problems, but one thing leads to another and we confided in each other, all because she said "thank you" for something I deemed insignificant. The wonders of how God works... 

That being said.. People may look fine on the outside, but you don't know what goes on deep down in their hearts. We are all great actors and actresses on a stage, and it feels good to be able to remove that mask and just be yourself. 

It's interesting reading back the past entries of this blog, the things I have written over the years since high school times. I must admit that the tone of the entries changes over time from the transition of high school into University, but then it's intriguing seeing how I was motivated for a while and then I fall back into the old self and then being motivated again and then back to the old self, exactly like a cycle. If I were to draw a chart of the times I was motivated and then down again....the chart would pretty much look like the heart beat monitor...humans can never stay motivated for a long period of time eh? 

Random thought

I really admire people who are able to put themselves in the shoes of other people. The ability to empathize at any given situation or circumstances straight away, as if it's their way of life is indeed a great feat, because I know my first reaction is to judge and then only to think.. By the time I rationalize and think, it's already too late. Words has been said, actions has been done. It's something I gotta work on.. 

So a few weeks ago I came across this blogger named Timothy Tiah (founder of Nuffnag) where he blogged about his wife's car was banged by a taxi driver (taxi driver's fault for driving too close) so he was mentioning that he rushed to the scene to rescue his wife and upon seeing the taxi uncle his heart soften. He knew that this uncle has a family to feed at home, earning a living through driving a taxi. Not that he knew this uncle personally but he was able to empathize, so instead of asking the uncle to pay for the damages (which was rightfully his fault) he paid the uncle for his taxi's damages even though the uncle was rude and asking for such a high compensation when the uncle was in the wrong. He managed to reduce the amount to RM 200 in the end. Tim could very well have just lodge a report and save the hassle of even paying or arguing with this uncle, but he chose to help the uncle. 

If I was in that situation, I don't think I would have the ability empathize on the spot. I would probably have argued my way through gritted teeth because it is after all my right of way. I wouldn't have had the same thought process he went through....Reading his story really inspires me :) Put yourself in that exact situation, how would you have reacted? I suppose there are no right or wrong answers, coz we make our decisions based on our background and past experiences, maybe some of us has been cheated before, maybe some of us are tired of being the "good guy" coz "good guys" are "stupid guys"... Shit happens but I think it doesn't hurt to do some random act of kindness, even if you were cheated. Coz ultimately God sees the heart and the intentions that you harbor, and well if you're cheated just be wiser next time, and the person who cheated you, probably needed the money more than you do.. 

Busy Busy Busy

September is gonna be the craziest month of the year! Even though I've stopped work, but the day I stop work marks the day the roller coaster ride starts >.<

13th - Meeting for CIP/Briefing for CIP/Briefing for Running Man
14th - Execution of Running Man
15th - CIP Day 1 - Sepang
16th - Shopping for BBQ CIP Day 3
17th - CIP Day 2 - Sepang
18th - CIP Day 3 - Sepang + BBQ
19th - TFM Meet & Greet
20th - Fly off to Kedah for ROS
21st - 24th - SMK Merbok, Kedah
25th - Interview with MOE
27th - Myanmar Refugee

and there goes my month of September...won't be seeing much of my family this month I guess =/ BRACE YOURSELF TO FACE THE MUSIC~

Last day of work!

It's been a month, only a month but I've learned so much. Most people think waitressing is a brainless job, a job in which people do when they can't study well; but I beg to differ. It's not a brainless job, or a job that has "nothing-much-to-learn", no doubt the job includes a lot of manual labor but I've learned a fair deal about the people I work with, the management and building my character.

Having some working experience previously while doing my internships in the hotel, I've witness people treating Banglas, Nepalese and Burmese as second class citizens. As if they weren't worth our time and we shouldn't be "associating" ourselves with them, so most of the time, these people were just greeted with a polite smile and that's it.  Working at Peruvie, I got the opportunity to work along side Nepalese, Burmese and Filipinos and it was a wonderful experience. Getting to know these people as people was an eye opening experience. So many times we overlook them because these were the people who does all the jobs we Malaysians don't want to do or known for their cheap labor; but if we open our sepet eyes, they are humans just as we are, who also has needs but are born into undesirable circumstances and due to that, deprived of opportunity as well. During the 1 month, I got to know my colleagues personally. How far they traveled, their nieces and nephews, their families, their own business back home and I thought to myself, they lead such interesting lives. They have a farm!! With pigs, goats, cows, chickens and everything. I got to know about their culture, and how they were so surprised that I'm not married yet at this age, most of them got married when they were 20, and they can't get a divorce or they will be look down upon. It's also interesting to know that half a month's salary in Malaysia could feed their families for 3 months! And so I joked that they would be millionaires when they return home one day ;) I have a sort of admiration for them, here they earn a mere RM 1,600 a month and yet it's enough to sustain them, and yet here I am complaining that RM 2,000 isn't enough to do anything at all...it all boils down to priorities I guess and so it thought me to think of how I'm spending my money and my priorities and to think of the many people living in the city with meager salaries and yet still needing to support families. It taught me to be grateful with what I have and that my family do not depend on me to put food on the table but in fact it's the other way round. These colleagues of mine, though they do not have much in possessions, but they have a BIG heart and they show their love and kindness in their own little ways. For example, they would leave aside a small bowl of food for me just in case the food was finished by the time I come in for work; or would reserve the body part of the fish for me as according to him, girls shouldn't be eating fish heads coz apparently it's bad for pregnancy. (Staff meals served there are usually of the useless parts of fish, basically meals there are very simple. Rice and egg/ rice and fried fish thats it.) The little thoughts count and I was touched by that small act of kindness that they showed me. It taught me that giving, no matter how small can bring a tremendous effect on the receiver.

This experience also thought me a lot about integrity. They are many tricks that the F&B people do to unsuspecting customers, and it has taught me to guard my heart and to know the intentions behind my actions.So many times, I caught myself doing things simply just because I want to go home fast and so many times my conscience would get the better of me and make known to me who I owe my KPI to so that I do my job whole heartedly. So yea, it's this constant awareness that I go through each day that builds my character. I should probably share this. I was naughty one day, I decided to steal a tip that the guest left behind (we were suppose to put tips in a box so that at the end of the month, it gets distributed to everybody, but unfortunately everybody does not include part-timers) so since tips only goes to full-timers, I thought what the heck, why should I work so hard and they get all the tips? So unfair! and so I put the RM 1 inside my pocket instead of the box. I worked through the night and when it was time to go home, I reached into my pocket and realized that the money is gone. That right there was a like literal slap across my face and the lesson came in a form of a RM 1 note. "money is the root of all evil" and it taught me that if I steal RM 1 today, I would steal RM 5 the next, and I would get so greedy about money that God knows what I'll do, so it taught me to earn my keep and what is not meant to be ours, let it be.

Lessons can be found everywhere and anywhere, and it's up to us if we want to pick it up. You can place a person in a place where there is "so much to learn" but if he/she refuses to take the lesson then what is there to learn? So waitressing is not a brainless job where there is nothing to learn, the question is more: Are you willing to learn?